When I was roommates with ‘The Hottest Girls at USU‘ we somehow or another found ourselves in the company of random, strange, or otherwise hideous boys. That is not to say that we didn’t get along with, or even enjoy the company or friendship of these boys – because we did. It just seemed that we had heard our share of hideous comments. After a couple of months of living together and laughing at many of these comments, we decided to dedicate a wall in our apartment to the preservation of these fabulous quotes. Each time we were privileged to hear a hideous comment from the mouths of our male friends we would write it on a slip of paper and add it to the wall.

Our wall soon became an icon. Although some boys found the whole thing to be hideous in and of itself, others came to get their picture taken with their quote. Some even tried to sign their name to their comment, but that was not permitted. Quotes on our wall were to remain anonymous.

Here we are, with our wall of Hideous Boy Moments!

Now, you have to understand – most of these quotes will only truly be funny those of us that lived them. Perhaps at some point on this blog I’ll explain in greater detail the stories behind some of these quotes. But for now please enjoy the list.

• There are just some things I can’t tell you right now. . . You girls just need to be very careful
• I won’t be coming back for a long time. I didn’t get any action, so I guess I better go!
• What, You have a weight problem?
• Don’t they teach etiquette in Highland?
• You don’t have FP!
• You were on the cruise?
• What? I showed you my stomach. That should have turned you on.
• I don’t feel the spirit anymore when I talk to you!
• What? Your middle name is Visa? No? Cuz’ you are everywhere I want to be.
• I’d like to close with a quote. . . if I don’t see you again – “Good Morning, good afternoon, good evening, and good night”
• Girls wipe? What?
• What happens on the ship. . . stays on the ship
• I have to get up in 2 hours
• Your bubble seems more like a force field to me
• So. . . are there a lot of hat girls in this complex?
• If I finish my paper fast – can we snuggle?
• The TEST
• It’s the whole bean bag thing
• Those boys are drunk
• That coat with that sweater? I don’t think so.
• Me too!
• It was just an impulse
• On the scale. . . she’s only a 4.
• Marry someone young, so you can train them.
• Hi, I’m Coffee. And my name is Table.
• I don’t know. . . I just don’t want to take you home yet.
• Please don’t send anymore rotten fruit
• Hypocrisy is a greater sin than murder. . . well, at least it’s worse than adultery.
• I have a nice butt to lay on
• You’re following us. . . like a little stupid goose
• Let’s go look at the dolphins
• Don’t believe everything you hear.
• We’re always happy here at AutoZone to help damsels in distress!
• I like you a lot better when you’re single
• I just wanted to tell you that I broke up with my significant other. . . I don’t know what this means to you at this time.
• High School relationships never work out. You’re wasting your time.
• I’d go on a date with you, but you’d find that I am exactly like the guys you are trying to avoid.
• NCMO
• Is there someone in the closet?
• She’s getting way too attached.
• Do you think we’re players? (Um, I think you’re wanna be players)

If you feel so motivated leave a comment suggesting which of these you would like to see explained in future posts.
If you happen to be one of the boys whose quote is featured herein and wish to own up to it, now is your chance.