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Up with Cavemen!

December 13th, 2007 · random

Last week Dave and I got a clever piece of advertising in the mail.
It was an “Up With Cavemen” letter. Obviously from Geico,  but without their logo. Basically it was a letter from the cavemen complaining about Geico’s advertising. We’ve all heard about it.

It was really, really hilarious. The letter suggested that the ad be changed to something like:

So easy a blueJay/log can do it. Geico.

Let it be know that we don’t have Geico Insurance. Nor have we really looked into it as an option. But, you have to admit, they’ve come up with some clever stuff.

For those of you who threw away that piece of mail without opening it, I tried to find a copy of the letter online. There is a version of it at http://upwithcavemen.com/caveman.htm, but it is SO NOT as funny as the one that came in the mail.

Oh and by the way, apparently I’m not the only one that thinks that Geico’s ad’s are funny. This guy does. And so does this person.

And then, there’s this. ROFL. I’m not entirely sure if its funny or just hideous. One thing is for sure. Don’t click on the link unless you are bored.

Anyway. That is all. Up with Cavemen!

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Christmas Cookies

December 12th, 2007 · a day in the life, food

My friend Michelle came over with her boys yesterday and we made some fun Christmas Cookies! They were a little different than traditional sugar cookies. And they were yummy.
Here is a picture. Please ignore my messy counter top.
Cookies

This is the recipe if you want to give them a try (we got it here):

Christmas Cookies
2/3 cup shortening
3/4 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon grated orange or lemon zest
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1 egg
4 teaspoons milk
2 cups flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt

Cream shortening, sugar, orange peel, and vanilla thoroughly. Add in egg and beat until light and fluffy. Add in the milk and mix.
Sift dry ingredients together, then blend into cream mixture. Divide dough in half (thirds if you double the recipe), slightly flatten between two sheets of waxed paper, then refrigerate for one hour (or freeze for 20 minutes.)

Roll out dough on lightly floured surface and cut into shapes with cookie cutters. Transfer shapes to lightly greased cookie sheet and paint cookies with soft brushes with egg yolk glaze:

Egg Yolk Glaze
1 egg yolk
1 teaspoon water
2 to 3 drops food coloring

Bake at 375-degrees for approximately 6 minutes. Do not allow to become brown.

Remove cookies from oven, remove cookies to wire rack to cool. Then, using a pastry bag or Ziploc, pipe with white icing to decorate.

White Decorative Icing
1 2-pound bag powdered sugar
1/4 cup milk
2 tablespoons egg white (optional)

Mix together, ensuring the icing is thick and somewhat retains its shape.

For the record, I really like the fact that the egg yolk glaze provides the majority of the coloring for these cookies. I love the fact that the need for frosting is kept to a minimum. So thank you Pioneer Woman for the great treat!

Here are a few more pictures of us getting crazy with the frosting. . .
Michelle Tina

Bridget and Josh had a different idea about the frosting. . .
Bridget & Josh

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VcR or BuSt!

December 10th, 2007 · college life, the hottest girls at USU

My sophomore year at Utah State, I moved into Cobble Creek apartments.

These were my roommates:
The Hottest Girls at USU!

Right from the beginning it was obvious that we were all a bit crazy and that we would get along great! (Even today we are still all great friends.)

One night, in the middle of the night. . . When all great college ideas come. . .
We had this idea. I don’t really remember who came up with it. But oh, was it a good idea. Maybe.

Anyway. We didn’t have a VCR. And back then there were still plenty of things we owned on VHS tape. We needed a VCR. Desperately. But, rather than just going out and purchasing one – like any other normal or respectable person would do – we decided to hold a fund raiser instead.

We decided to have some sort of party-like activity. Something that would not only raise money for our VCR, but it would allow us to get out and meet a few new people. We named the event “VcR or BuSt!” By morning we had several hundred fliers printed and the following afternoon we were busy distributing them. It wasn’t enough to just tape them to doors either. . . wherever possible we physically handed out the papers and introduced ourselves.

We were young. And crazy. And out of control. And we knew it. But we didn’t care.

We just went about our business passing out these fliers:
VcR or bUsT flier

There was just one minor problem with the flier (besides the fact the ‘funness’ isn’t a word). Did you notice the line: “Don’t miss the hottest girls @ USU”? Well, first you have to remember that we made this flier in the middle of the night. And at that time of day everything is a good idea. We started talking the next morning. . . So what if people come and say, ‘So where are the Hottest Girls at USU?’. . . we hadn’t thought of that. We figured that if they asked we would just say that they hadn’t shown up yet.

The party started at 8:00. And at first it was pretty lame. By around 9:00 though our apartment was hopping. There were people filling our living room and kitchen and groups of people out our door on the balcony. That’s when the fun began!

Let me explain the activities listed on the flier. I know you’re curious.

Kissing Booth
This was Amanda’s job. She volunteered. Though she soon became tired of the job and quit. Kisses cost between $1 and $5 dollars (depending on how attractive the guy was), and they length of the kiss also varied greatly. I think she got 2 or 3 kisses in before calling it quits.

Exotic Baked Treats
These were Rice Krispie Treats made with Fruity Pebbles. And other such “exotic” things.

Human Hot Fudge Sundaes
This was the HIGHLIGHT of the evening. Michelle and one of her good friends dressed in tank tops and shorts and people paid $1 to squirt them with ice cream toppings. It was kind of crazy how popular it was. Several people came back for second and third rounds.

Petting Zoo
Don’t ask. This was not the highlight. Just imagine a bunch of stuffed animals piled on a bed with some sort of wild animal soundtrack playing in the background. And there you have it. A petting zoo.

Raffle Prizes
We had a Zebra-print inflatable chair that someone got for signing up for a free checking account at Zion’s bank. That was the raffle prize. No one entered the raffle. We kept the chair. I have no idea where it is now.

Pumpkin Carving contest
Yea, this didn’t happen either. I don’t think we even bothered to buy pumpkins.

Live Exotic Fish
Also known as goldfish. 10 cent fish + 50 cent glass jar from D.I. and a small piece of raffia = Exotic Fish for sale. $2.50 each. We had five or six of them. We sold all of them. And we witnessed the death of one of them as someone threw it off the balcony outside our apartment. That wasn’t funny.

Live Music
Our neighbor came over and played his guitar for awhile. He got free exotic baked treats.

Dancing
Go ahead. Dance. There was music, right. No one danced.

Fish Pond
Carrie had a test the next day, so she sat in the bathtub with a pile of blankets and her textbooks and attached a 10 cent prize to the end of the fairy-wand fishing pole whenever anyone threw it over.

Coupons for a ‘floor to ceiling shine’
I think we had one taker for this. Amanda and Michelle’s idea. For $15 (I think) they offered to clean the apartment of whomever purchased the coupon.

Low Cost Massages
$5 shoulder massages. No, we weren’t certified or qualified massage therapists. A couple of takers here.

For those of you that missed it. Aren’t you sad? When all was said and done we made about $63. We bought a VCR. And for the next few days we laughed at ourselves. We laughed loud. We were pretty hideous. And we said, “We ARE the Hottest Girls at USU!” Perhaps it was conceded or immature. . . but it worked for us.

And thus we were for evermore the self-proclaimed ‘Hottest Girls at USU!’

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Oh, who knows what to do?

December 9th, 2007 · bridget, family

“Help! Help” cried the page when the sun came up. “King Bidgood’s in the bathtub, and he won’t get out! Oh, who knows what to do?”

Bedtime at our home is always entertaining.
There is always one more thing Bridget needs before we leave the room. One more story. A different blanket. Another kiss. One more hug.

And, there’s usually one (or two, or three) things she finds that she needs AFTER we close the door and leave.

Now that she can turn the doorknob and exit her bedroom by herself bedtime has become an interesting challenge. Sometimes it feels like an hour-long struggle. Sometimes it really is. We try to find some balance between giving in and threating to spank her bum over and over again. Tonight she kept saying she was scared. Finally we suggested that she could be allowed to sleep with her door open, if she stayed in bed. To my utter shock and amazement it actually worked! Somehow, though, I don’t anticipate it working that well every night. Alas! Alack! Alack! Alas!
Despite this typical toddler behavior there are a couple of things about bedtime that are just. . . Cute!

  1. Her favorite bedtime story is King Bidgood’s in the Bathtub (by Don and Audrey Wood). Dave and I both have it memorized, we’ll told it so much. And she almost does. Her version is a bit more scattered. Something like this:

    “Help. Help. Cried Page. Sun came up. King Bidgood’s in bathtub. Won’t get out. Who knows what to do? Who knows what to do?”

    “I do. Get out. Time battle. Today battle in the tub”
    I caught her tucking Daddy in for a nap today (in her bed) while telling him that story. It wasn’t long before she had closed the door and was coming down the stairs to announce that Daddy was taking a nap. Much to her dismay (and probably his) I sent her right back up to “wake him up” for dinner.
  2. Bridget and Dave do this thing every night before bed. Bridget calls it “1-2-3-4-5.” Basically it consists of Dave bench pressing Bridget while she sits on his hands and holds on for dear life. For her it is a fun ride and an opportunity to practice counting to 50 (with daddy’s help, of course). For him, it is exercise.This evening, while they were playing this little game. Dave got to 50 and, as is typical, he stopped. Apparently Bridget wasn’t finished yet though because she quickly chimed in with “51.” After which Dave was naturally obligated to continue. I think she is catching on. I wonder what will happen when she learns to count to 100??

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Elf Bowling

December 8th, 2007 · college life, techno geeks

For whatever the reason I started thinking about this funny game I used to play. It’s called Elf bowling.

Elf Bowling Screenshot

I don’t really know why I like the game. But I do.
It’s made by a company called NStorm and was introduced to me several years ago while I worked at Iomega. Since then there have been several other revisions of the game, but if you ask me, the original is still the best.

Basically, you play the roll of Santa Clause and try to bowl down the elves. Except the sneaky critters will sometimes move out of the way or do some other strange thing to avoid being hit. They fart, they moon you, and they call out all manner of elfish insults. They even go on strike. There is a frog and a deer that appear at various points in the game. They can be taken out with the bowling ball too – though I don’t think it gains you any points.

Download it here (PC only). And Happy Holiday’s.
http://www.freewarefiles.com/program_1_12_10546.html

Oh how I wish there were a Mac Version!

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Butt Munch

December 7th, 2007 · food

I got this recipe from my good friend Sandra. It’s good. Really good. And also terribly addicting.
As should be evident by the name, eating too much could result in a bigger butt.

Butt Munch

Crunchy Munchy Big Butt

1 box Rice chex
1 Box Corn chex
2 cans (12 oz.) mixed nuts
2 bags sunflower seeds

Mix all these and lay thin on waxed paper

Melt: 5 cubes butter (now you know why it’s called BIG BUTT he he)

3 cups Karo Surup
3 cups White sugar
2 tsp. vanilla

Heat over Med. heat, stir constantly it burns fast

Boil for five minutes and pour over mix

I only made half a recipe. And I only used peanuts. And less sunflower seeds that it calls for.
I thought about adding a bit of peppermint extract and some crushed up candy canes, as sort of a holiday version. But since it was the first time I made it, I didn’t. If anyone decides to try it that way let me know how it goes.

A couple of days after I made it, Dave was wondering around the kitchen and asked, “Hey, do we have any more of that Butt Munch stuff?” And so, from that day forward the ‘daire aire enhancing’ treat was referred to as “Butt Munch!”

Make it. Enjoy it. Buy new pants.

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‘Frosty’ was taken

December 6th, 2007 · a day in the life, techno geeks

I want you all to meet Fred.
Fred, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Fred.
Fred

Fred was our first snowman of the year. He had charcoal for eyes, a baby carrot for a nose, and a wire twist-tie (from some Christmas lights) for a mouth. His scarf and hat came from various items lying around my studio. And from eBay.

Fred was made with love. He is a nerds snowman. I mean, really. Who uses a twist-tie for a snowman’s mouth?

Fred is nearly all melted now. He was cute. We’ll miss him.

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Death Mask Meets Jell-O Mold

December 5th, 2007 · college life, the funniest people we know

This entry was taken from the TFPWK Blog (originally posted in October).
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Some recent conversations have found me remembering the crazy random things that used to fill my life. Here is one story – in light of the season, that might peak your interest.
It was around Halloween time. Year 2003, and we were preparing to throw the Halloween bash of the century – ok, maybe not that big. . . we were preparing to throw a party for close friends and neighbors. We’d seen jell-o molds for brains or hands or other creepy Halloween-like things. But we got this crazy idea to make a mold of someones face and use that for Jell-o.

As we investigated our options, we knew that we didn’t have the time, money, or means to make a real plaster cast and plastic mold – so we’d have to be creative.

One day while shopping around at Michaels Craft Store my roommate, Kari, and I came upon this stuff – a gauze type plaster that dries fast. Great, we thought – it would be a sort of “death mask meets jell-o mold”. So we bought a bunch of it, and set off to find some victims.

We had it all figured out. We’d cover the eyebrows and scalp line of our victim with Vaseline so the plaster wouldn’t rip out their hair, and we’d give them a pair of small air holes, one at each nostril. After things dried up enough we’d patch the air holes with more plaster. Let it dry overnight, cover it with a few coats of Mod Podge, and we’d be good to go!

Everything went smashingly! Well, almost.

(Aside: I have searched for an hour and can’t find any pictures as examples. I’ll post them when I find them. Alas, Alack!)

Meet John, and Tosh.
These guys were are neighbors and good friends. They were also really good sports.

As described above, we covered the necessary areas of their faces with Vaseline. Then we slowly took turns layering strip after strip of plaster coated gauze on their faces. Of course, we were laughing the entire time. We kept going until everything except the small nasal air holes were covered. I can’t remember how long we made them stay that way – covered in plaster masks – I just remember all the laughter. When the masks did come off it was a pretty smooth process. No loss of facial hair to speak of. We placed them on a baking sheet and dried them on a low temperature in our oven for a couple of hours. After the initial dry we basted them with a thick coat of Mod Podge and put them back in the oven. This process was repeated several times over the next 24 hours or so.

When all was said and done, we had some AMAZING new Jell-o molds. Wink. Wink. I think the main downfall of the guaze-type plaster was the texture that was left imprinted into the mold. (Note: I’m pretty sure that this stuff wasn’t meant for making Jell-o molds) Didn’t matter though. We sprayed the dried molds with some Pam, and poured in the jell-o.

After the Jell-o set up we popped the molded treat out onto a plate. It took a little dip in warm water to loosen things up a bit (just like any other Jell-o mold).

The Jell-o faces not only looked like their human counterparts, but they were the hit of the party. Much to our dismay, no one actually ate the jell-o though. Too Bad.

Anyway, to wrap things up. . .
For anyone else venturing to try this. I recommend a few extra coats of Mod Podge. The color from the jell-o dyed the plaster in a few places. Oh, the boys got to take their masks home.

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The Beginning of the End!

December 4th, 2007 · a day in the life

Social blogging is something I’ve thought about time and time again, but never really dived into. Until now.
I am no good at writing in my Journal. I think I average about once a month. But I LOVE pictures. I think I could be better if I could tell stories with pictures. And I am kind of a geek. . . and you can’t really add hyperlinks to the pages of a paper journal and have them mean anything.

I’ve tried to start a blog for TFPWK (The Funniest People We Know – A story for another day) but the content was so specific there that I lost interest. I also started one for my photography company, Pristine Photo. That went fine for awhile, but I found myself wanting to post pictures of my kid – and that’s hardly appropriate for a business oriented blog. I need to get in the game with that blog again though. Then, just under a year ago Dave and I started a monthly newsletter. And I really started to get into it. But the problem now is that if I include every little thing (plus a few more pictures) the newsletters are coming out to be 20-30 some odd printed pages. Not only is that a lot of paper, but its FAR TOO MUCH information about our family to stuff into a single reading. And I am certain that it is only a matter of time before each and every one of the people who read it is committed to a mental institution. Really! It’s that bad.

The only logical step was to enter the wonderful world of blogging. So, here I am.

I imagine I’ll copy over the few random entries I have over at the TFPWK blog and just dissolve that one pretty soon. And as time goes on you’ll probably read way too much about 2 year old tantrums, ingrown toenails, and belly button lint. Should be fun!

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